Tag Archives: UK politics

Politics of the Surreal : Episode 1

The Bash Street Lord Snooty School of Politics

Sir: Right boys, who can solve this political riddle?

My first is in “I” but not in “team”
My second adds, a symbol, but is not cross
My third is in “politics”, not in “polecats”…

Ed: Sir, sir, I know!

Sir: Yes, Mlliband Minor?

Ed: Is it “I & I”, Sir; meaning “we”,SIr, meaning “TOGETHER”?

Sir: Isn’t it always with you, boy? Can you please let someone else answer next time?

Boris: Ha, ha, POLE-cats! Milliband smells like a POLE-cat Sir, AND he went to pleb-school!

Sir: Shush, Johnson, we’re laughing at you, not with you. The Poles were on our side.
You’re very quiet at the back Clegg. I hope you haven’t fallen asleep again.

Responding to Irrational Politics

David Cameron, currently Prime Minister of the UK has tried to put together his thoughts on faith and morality. We might give him the benefit of the doubt and say he is simply poor at communicating his ideas but I’m afraid he may actually think like this.

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/apr/17/christianity-compels-me-to-make-difference includes the following:

“People who, instead, advocate some sort of secular neutrality fail to grasp the consequences of that neutrality, or the role that faith can play in helping people to have a moral code. Of course, faith is neither necessary nor sufficient for morality.

Many atheists and agnostics live by a moral code – and there are Christians who don’t. But for people who do have a faith, that faith can be a guide or a helpful prod in the right direction – and whether inspired by faith or not that direction or moral code matters.”

My translation:

Atheists are silly because I have faith. *
Morality is a good thing and it matters.
People with and without faith can behave morally or immorally.
People who have faith, only have morals because they have faith. *

The “*”s mark the points where Mr. Cameron has demonstrated beliefs that I believe all rational people would call “Wrong”. I’m not criticising his faith in Christianity but his logic. It worries me both that he is in a position to make decisions and that the other members of the cabinet appear to let him. Either they’re as daft as him or he isn’t really in charge.

If he is the acceptable face of the Conservative party, what ‘the hell’ is operating his strings?

Freedom from The Press

Sorry, I need to take a slight diversion here to pick up some POLITICS.

I’ve come to the conclusion that ‘The P Word’ is about finding a balance between people’s sense of fairness for all and their sense of self-interest. In the West, we also seem to expect a fair-sized dollop of what we call “freedom” with that, and perhaps a government willing to insist that other countries try it too. “It’s humus. Try it. No, it smells of garlic but it doesn’t taste of it. Bloody try it, will you? No, not that one, we only eat the organic”

I don’t know much about politics but I know what I like. OK, not true but: I know what I DON’T LIKE!
“What?”
This, all of it, it’s rubbish. I hate it. Smash the SYSTEM!
“Some of it’s all right, can’t we keep those bits and vote to decide what to make better?”
Vote? Pah! No, it’s all got to go, so we can move forward to a bright new future, together, following me.
“What’s that going to be like?”
There are still a few niggling details like that to be worked out but, “SMASH THE SYSTEM!”

I paraphrase slightly but this seems to be the gist of Mr. Brand’s argument… What? Yes, Russel Brand – the rock star. I don’t know what band. Yes, the one with the trousers, and the hair and the Guy Fawkes beard. “I am Spartacus.”

The thing is, he seems to have captured the spirit of the moment. He feels our frustration. He was poor once. He knows the well deserved disrespect for our leaders who don’t seem to think we have the brains to see through all the spin; the anger at there not being enough difference between the lot of them to make it worth a walk down to the scout-hut. But ‘revolution’? Really, Russell?

I like Freedom. I like Free software and free Internet and free downloads and free speach and freedom of the press and free energy. What? No that would be silly. Stop being ridiculous, if you want people to take you seriously about politics. Freedom to protest though; that used to be a good one. As long as it was nice. A nice walk, some witty placards, a bit of a sing-song and none of that French malarkey – barricades and burning and being rude to policemen.

So when the Twitters lit up in a bonfire of energy bills, late last night and the tight-trousered-one appeared, surrounded by French mime artists, I didn’t know what to think. The Lefties were soon there to tell me, complaining there was a media black-out, claiming there were thousands of people but putting up photos of 50 of their mates. “Yes, here’s where they beat us senseless”. I exaggerate (slightly.)
“Yeah, sure”, I thought.
“You won’t see this on the BBC”, they said.
I searched the BBC for “million mask”. Up it came. “Hundreds of people” in “peaceful protest”. I went to bed. I’d had enough Revolution for one night.

Morning. The radio alarm wakes before me, tuned to BBC Radio 4. Nothing. An hour passes. Nothing. Pick up phone and search BBC for “million mask”. Same article. Wait, no! 11 arrests. fires. unrest, scuffles… What? Did the pubs shut? I widen the search… Guardian, yes then nothing. Back to Twitter “#MillionMaskMarch”. A few activists in the US. It was as if London hadn’t ever happened, according to the right-wing press and the BBC. Nothing on the Wireless or the front page of the news website.

This morning, I signed up to follow @RustyRockets on Twitter. I threw in @MillionMaskMarch for good measure and asked @BBCNickRobinson what the hell was going on at the BBC. He hasn’t told me. I don’t think he’s allowed to. That’s rather worrying in a democracy, or something that looks very like one.

By the way, it turns out my mate was there. He says there were thousands of others. When you hide the truth or lie to us now, we find out about it. You seem to have made me join the 99% who don’t trust you. No, I won’t wear a stupid mask. Politicians, you shouldn’t either and please take that gag off the BBC. They work for us, not you.